How do you start again? How do you stop hurting and missing someone so much? No matter how much it hurts I guess you just need to move on, which is what I will try to do. It is so hard to comprehend that dad won't be around in body any more. I know he's in a better place and will be watching over all of us the rest of our days. I know there is lots more grieving to do and future events that will trigger the great sense of loss over and over again. For now it still hurts every day.
The services last week were a great tribute to my fathers memory. We saw so many people. Maybe as many as 500 over the course of two days. The memorial service itself was very nice. Instead of flowers we had Christmas trees at the side of the alter. Dad's ashes were kept in an "Old Pal" tackle box along with a large picture of him holding up a trophy fish. My sister Cheri and brother Scott somehow pulled off singing a few songs that had the whole place sobbing. They did an incredible job. My brother Tad delivered a Eulogy of sorts, a great tribute to dad that said it all and was very well done. Everyone was so generous in their love and support shown to all of us. Monetarily there was an exceptional amount of money donated to the church, local hospice, and a scholarship fund we sent up to be given in dad's memory. Thanks to everyone for all the heartfelt sympathy and support.
Running:
I only recently found out that dad had been a "miler" in high school. I never did find out what his times might have been or how many years he ran. I will have to look this up. My memories of dad related to running have to do with him coming to watch me race. There was a big picture on the picture board at church of me and dad after Grandma's marathon in 2006. He had a bigger smile than me. It made running in the races "up north" fun for me knowing he would be there along the course and at the finish to offer encouragement and congratulations. He was always proud of me for doing this. The Lakefront marathon will be run in his memory, knowing he's watching from above.
I only recently found out that dad had been a "miler" in high school. I never did find out what his times might have been or how many years he ran. I will have to look this up. My memories of dad related to running have to do with him coming to watch me race. There was a big picture on the picture board at church of me and dad after Grandma's marathon in 2006. He had a bigger smile than me. It made running in the races "up north" fun for me knowing he would be there along the course and at the finish to offer encouragement and congratulations. He was always proud of me for doing this. The Lakefront marathon will be run in his memory, knowing he's watching from above.
Hunting:
This is the activity where dad and I spent the most time doing or talking about. This and fishing. I will really miss not having my partner with me. More than my other brothers over the past twenty years dad and I spent the most time hunting together. Part of this is because I'm the only one who bow hunts, part of this is because dad and I hunted close to each other while the rest hunted "the other side of the hill". I'll miss seeing his big smile and seeing how proud he was when you came dragging a deer out of the woods even though he didn't even see one. I'll miss the comfort of him waiting at night at the end of the road with the truck warmed up as I get out of the woods last. I'll miss the company at those breaks during the day and the special time at night going over the days hunt.
Gardening:
Gardening:
Dad was never much of a gardener. I remember planting a garden as a kid, but we never got much. I'm sure this was because it just wasn't priority, and gardening takes patience and time. Patience dad had, but taking time for a lower priority was another story. The memories of dad I have related to gardening will always be related to Christmas trees. Dad trimmed trees for a summer job and cut trees in the fall for a nursery in the early days. For over 40 years he sold trees locally, some from the nursery and some he had grown himself. Each year this was a big deal for dad and something I think he truly enjoyed doing despite all the work. I spent lots of time helping trim, cut, deliver and sell trees with him over the years. I know how special this was to him and that he didn't really want to ever give this up. One of the last things he wanted to do with me before he became too ill was to go to the tree farm to go over which trees should be cut for a couple special customers this coming season.
No comments:
Post a Comment